If you want to last longer in bed, you will find a lot of advice online, and much of it is not backed by evidence. This page gives a short, honest guide to what is supported, what to try and what to be careful of. It is general information and not a medical assessment. No approach is guaranteed to work.
01
What works best (ranked by evidence)
Based on the guidelines from the International Society for Sexual Medicine (ISSM) and the European Association of Urology (EAU), and in rough order of how much support they have:
Medicines and topical products, decided with a doctor
The guidelines give these the most support, but they are not for everyone. See how medicines are used and delay sprays and condoms.
Behavioural and psychological approaches
The evidence is modest, and benefits can fade. See behavioural techniques and sex therapy and counselling.
Pelvic floor exercises
The evidence is limited. See pelvic floor exercises.
For the full comparison, see the overview of treatment options.
02
Techniques you can try tonight
- Slow down. Pay attention to how arousal builds, and ease off before the point of no return.
- Take the pressure off penetration. Spend time on other forms of intimacy first, so that you are not racing.
- Try different positions, and pause when you need to. Agree with your partner that pausing is fine.
- Breathe slowly and keep your body relaxed.
- Talk to your partner about what you both want.
None of these is a proven fix. They are low-risk things to try, and the start-stop and squeeze methods are explained step by step on the page about behavioural techniques.
03
Habits and lifestyle
Regular physical activity, enough sleep, managing stress and limiting alcohol support general wellbeing and may help you feel more relaxed. We cannot say that they make you last longer. Worry is a common driver, so it also helps to read about performance anxiety and PE.
04
Products and medicines in brief
Numbing sprays, creams and condoms reduce sensitivity, and some medicines delay ejaculation. Medicines need a doctor, and products should be used exactly as directed. Avoid products that promise instant or guaranteed results, and avoid buying medicines online.
05
Popular tips that do not work
Thinking about something unrelated
Distraction is a common tip, but there is little evidence for it, and it can make sex feel disconnected for both of you.
Wearing two condoms
This is not recommended. The extra friction can make them tear or slip.
Masturbating just before sex
Some men find that it helps, but we are not aware of good evidence, and it may not suit everyone.
Pills and powders from social media or informal sellers
They may be fake or unsafe.
Comparing yourself with what you see in porn
It sets an unrealistic benchmark. See how long sex should last.
06
When it is more than a technique problem
If you cannot delay ejaculation most of the time, if it is upsetting you, or if it began suddenly, or you have pain or erection problems, it may be more than a matter of technique. Try the private self-check, read the main guide to PE and see when to see a doctor.